The Desmond Jones School of Mime is known for many things. Here are a few things you might not know about them.
- The school’s pep band plays no songs; the musicians play only “air trumpet,” “air Sousaphone,” “air piccolo,” etc.
- There are no words to the school’s fight song
- The Dean of the school makes no morning announcements over the PA
- The students’ favorite ringtone is…silent.
- The school’s librarian has never had to “shhhhhh” a student. Ever.
- The school nurse has never reported a case of laryngitis
- They’ve won the State Charades Championship so many times, they’re no longer allowed to compete
- Opposing basketball teams have little problem shooting free throws in the Jones Gymnasium
- The debate team sucks
- There are no “poetry slams” on campus
- It is always windy on the campus of the Desmond Jones School of Mime
Mr. Desmond Jones
Posted by Mark Wegener 
The Local Paper 